Today I won an award. Of all the monkeys I work with in the entirety of US Bank, I apparently use my stick the best (Giggity). I like to think of it as the "Excelling in Mediocrity" award. But, to the several hundred other bankers whose asses I kicked, I would like to say this: I deserve this award. I shall cherish it forever, and immediately hock it.
In other news, My employer seems to be pro-Obama, or at least anti-Clinton. When searching for various news articles at work, I am allowed to read political articles involving the former or ol' Johhny McNewbush. However, should I venture to the Clinton side of the articles(insert Imperial March here), I get a big fat ACCESS DENIED error message. And its only the pro-Clinton articles that are blocked. Anything with a headline reading "Obama whips the piss out of Clinton in NC" is fine, but click on "Clinton Takes West Virginia" and BOOM! You've just been reported to the district manager for internet abuse. Now, I could understand being accused of internet abuse if I was reading things like "Clinton Takes It In West Virginia" or "Obama Whips the Piss out of Clinton in NC in Public for Money". But that's simply not the case... I am a man of standards, damn it. And if the bank ever captured my standards I would send in every last soldier to save them. Because without standards, how would I conquer Vermont?
Think aboot it...
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